Monthly Archives: April 2013

Chapter One : Torpor (Part I) ~First Draft~

Poetry prelude for Chapter One

Screams encroached upon Ash’s dreams, shattering his temporary illusions of riding alongside Lord Elman’s guards. In his dream he is free from the toils of working the land for the Lord and having to return home only to tend his fields and animals. Instead the wind cascaded across his face as he galloped with assurance upon his black steed. The steed’s unblemished coat shone in the sunshine and her muscles rippled in delight with each stride. The weight of his metal armour weighed heavy on his shoulder, but the burden of being a protector warmed him like only the summer sunshine could. His mind relished the warmth that for most his life had never known, and his thread bare rags he wore were replaced by the cloth of a knight’s stable. The warmth, the material goods and the freedoms of such a position were scattered images, as Ash had no clear notion of such feelings and possessions. He had only observed guards from a distance as a stranger dreaming of all the romanticised lives that he would live as a guard. His ride was suddenly over, as he now found himself lying down in the trodden mud puddles of an unknown land, fighting an unknown enemy with a sword bearing towards his head. However the man holding the sword was hidden in the shadows.

Ash startled awake as the sword struck. He found himself shivering and huddled in his sinew blankets of scraps. The coldness of the night biting deep into him, the blankets thread bare offered little comfort and the central hearth in their house was now reduced to dull embers that feebly tried to lick the bitter chill hanging. An awkward atmosphere clung to the smoke filled house. It wasn’t the cold because Ash was used to feeling cold each and every night during the winter. Unusual for the dead of the night the animals hidden in the dark recess of the house were agitated and restless. Although his eyes were open his mind still slept, taking a while to catch what all his senses were yelling at him.

Through the gloom the fearful cries that first appeared as a nightmare now pierced his stupor as he realised that the screams were far from any dream and set firmly in his reality. Slowly Ash arose, the sound of other voices within his home mumbling under breath. The only light within the house illuminated from the central hearth, with warm embers barely lighting the inner walls. The poor visibility wasn’t helped by the smoke thickened air that lingered eternally within the confines of the house throughout winter.

A lonely silhouette was visible at the door, it held a hoe firmly however the only intended use appeared to till soil. It was his Uncle Garyson whom he and his father, Carel, lived with. It was his Uncle’s house, and under Aunt Bessima’s insistence, he had invited them to share their house after the death of Ash’s mother. Ash could make out the shape of his Aunt Bessima sitting up from her bed.

He could hear his Aunt asking his Uncle what were the screams, he didn’t acknowledge her question simply directing her to take the children to the back of the house with the animals. She followed without any rebuttal. Calmly she gathered the children and lead them to the sanctuary with the animals at the rear of the house. Aunt told Ash to follow her, however he ignored her and joined his father and uncle at the door.

Continues to Part II

Ersnon Glossary

(Constructive criticism, comments, suggestions, ideas, opinions etc. welcomed throughout)


Posted by on Monday 29th April, 2013 in Creative Writing, The Struggle Within


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Easter Tolerance with a Twist of Irony

A short story I wrote for 20 Lines a Day around Easter time, so about a month ago. Involves a little thought by the reader … Easter Tolerance with a Twist of Irony.

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Posted by on Monday 29th April, 2013 in Creative Writing


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Torpor (Revision 1)

Original Torpor poem that I have revised, and tomorrow I will publish the first lines from the story with the same title (I will post the first chapter in several posts so as not to overload you with text in one hit).

Wolves unleashed by the darkened skies;
Like rapids they flow through the camp.
Stifled fires hide their hungry eyes
And the sheep fall, lost under the sleepy lamp.

Other lambs hide from the ravenous storm
And a lonely lion cub, raised by the flock,
Is uncertain that sacrifices are warm.
He wanted to fight, and not hide under a rock.

Surrounded by sheep, will the cub bleat or,
In time discover the truth and find his roar.

Story that proceeds this poem posted …


Posted by on Monday 29th April, 2013 in Poetry, The Struggle Within


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Her Tragedy ~ Reblogged (April Challenge – Day 1)

Thought a good idea for April’s poetry challenge would be to revise/review my old poems with one each day. I am writing a new poem (with edits each day) on 20 Lines a Day so this is my alternative on my personal blog. So here is my first offering, my first poem I blogged on here (original here) revisited with edits. Please feel free to provide constructive criticism, and please leave comments about what you like.

i. Seduction
Alone unburdened I stand on golden sands
That shift endlessly, teasingly between toes.

Gazing across Her bruised ocean’s wake,
She roars at Her victims in the distance.

The sun falls under Her drowning cries,
Quelling the shard remains of wronged glares.

And the moon grows to full bloom,
Bathing the waters in spectral awe.

In my solitude Her power seduces,
And spells resonate from Her core.

Pulling under my relinquished desires
From my heart, I warm Her tonight .

ii. Sacrifice
In mourning, there are fresh promises
Delivered daily in recurring waves.

The retreating tides concede a breath,
That I withdraw in selfish haste

For lustful is Her trembling voice
That defy, but I am deaf to Her silent alarms

My life rescinds under Her ubiquitous gaze.
Beholding what lies in plain sight,

Graceful is Her demeanour under stress,
And fallen is Her granite fortress

But Her love is sacrificed for brightly jewels
Malevolent deeds sown, I harm Her today.

iii. Symmetry
Trees weep,which are rooted in affliction
And dancing leaves betray their wrath.

The land quivers under feet planted deep,
With vented thoughts. Her advice is disdain

Alone burdened, muddied and fallen
I disappear to caverns buried.

In desperation, bowed at Her temple
Burning sacrifices extinguished

Rising mercury muffles merciful requests
And mist hides my desperate cries.

I love Her with my darkened heart
Her will is to be told: “Symmetry!”

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Posted by on Wednesday 3rd April, 2013 in Challenge, Poetry


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April Challenge (Poetry)

Well as you may have gathered I have started writing on 20 Lines a Day, and although I am trying to keep my poetry largely on this blog and use 20 Lines to explore my short story creativity, I enjoy the challenges that they post on there.  The current challenge for April is to write a poem on the first April and then review, improve and expand upon the poem each day of April.  The idea is to not write 30 ordinary poems each day of April but write one excellent poem for April (a little different than the regular idea).

So read, critique and comment on my poem.  Not sure I will revise it each day, but will revise it regularly throughout April.  Please have a read and hopefully you enjoy it.

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Posted by on Monday 1st April, 2013 in Challenge, Comments, Poetry


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